Blackhawks vs. Blue JacketsWin Recap

"How Swede It Is"


Dude, wait up, give me some of that ju-ju

I suppose a great way to follow up a heartbreaking loss of a game to a hated division rival, and the loss of an important player is to welcome one of the worst teams in the NHL to your rink. We've seen this team plenty, already, but they keep coming back for more. This time around the Hawks faced Curtis Sanford in net, and they brand new interim Head Coach Todd Richards. It seems like GM's wait for the portion of the schedule when they are about to face the Hawks, to fire their head coaches. The Hawks looks a little different as well, with Jimmy Hayes, Andrew Shaw and Ben Smith all playing and Sharpie NOT playing. This was game 1 of life without Sharpie, and maybe a glimpse into what the next month will look like.

Thanks to some shotty officiating the Hawks spent a good portion of the first period on the penalty kill, but they were able to kill them off. When all was said and done, the Hawks were out shot 9-5 going into the break, which could have been much worse. The second period had the same tone but there was some scoring to go along. The Hawks scored 2 goals, and the Blue Jackets scored one with both teams getting 13 shots on net. The third period was the Hawks period outscoring the Jackets 3-1 on only 7 shots. I guess that's why the Blue Jackets have such a horrible record.

The Good

• If the Hawks were going to have to take the lead it was going to have to be shorthanded. Of course, That's exactly what happened. Hoss and Invisibolly hooked up shortly after the MegaMayers instigation/fighting penalty, to take a 1-0 lead on pure hard work. Hossa put on a penalty kill clinic, and dragged Nikitin and Rootin Tyutin down the ice long enough for Bolland to join him. Hoss then fed Bolland, who put a little backhand/forehand move on Sanford to give the Hawks a 1-0 lead. I love Bolland's celebration. "Nothing to see here, been there done that."
• Pick-to-Click Vik continued his hot play against the Jackets, scoring with about 5 minutes left in the second period. After El Capitan and HurriKaner did all the dirty work, Vik came fresh off the bench and straight up the gullet. You can hear Kane call for the pass from Toews, and Kane took it hard behind the net. Kane then hit Vik with a sweet dish, and he powered it through Sanford. 2-1 Hawks.
• Vik just kept a rollin in the third period, scoring his second of the game on a delayed penalty. The Deuce simply threw the puck at the net like the Hawks SHOULD on the PP, with two defensemen standing in front. Stalberg grabbed a fat rebound, curled and snapped it past Sanford for a 3-1 Hawks lead.
• Agent Smith followed up the Stalberg goal with one of his own, 27 seconds later. The defender played him well, pushing him to the outside on his backhand, and he just chipped a soft backhand towards the net. Sanford completely whiffed on the puck. and just gave further evidence as to why Columbus is so bad. Queue up the beat writer silliness, the hero has arrived. 4-1 Hawks.
• Vik Stalberg finished off the Hat Trick with an empty netter after badly outracing David Savard, and missing on a tough first chance. He stuck with the play and was able to finally cap the hatty. Atta boy, Vik!
• The preschoolers were fairly quiet, outside of Smith's goal, but they did nothing to hurt themselves or their cases to stick around. Hayes and Shaw never really looked overmatched and both used their bodies to create positive things for the Hawks.
• I think it's time MegaMayers sees more ice time. Granted he spent an eternity in the box for his fighting/instigation debacle, but he's been a firestarter all season. He has skill. Let him show some leadership and that fucking grit everyone has been talking about.
• Tazer was over 70% again on faceoffs. So money he doesn't even know it.

The Bad

• The Jackets tied the game up as Leddy got manhandled in front of Crawford for a rebound, by RJ Umberger. Crawford couldn't coral the initial shot, and it ended up smack in the middle of a pile of shit in front of the crease. Keith was late getting back to help out the overmatched Leddy, and puck ended up in the net. 1-1
• Antoine Vermette grabbed the Jacket's second goal of the game when he was allowed to plant his ass in front of Crawford courtesy of Nick Leddy. Instead of tying up the defender, just drop to one knee, Nick. That one always works. Don't lift his stick or use some leverage to keep him from having his way.
• Just a few minutes into the game, the Hawks were buzzing around, but they couldn't muster a shot on net. Then a tense moment for all Chicago fans. Keith took a shot that went off a Jackets defender and hit El Capitan right smack in the fucking garbanzo. After looking dazed for a minute, he immediately headed back to the locker room. The entire Hawks fanbase held their breath for the next 5 minutes, until he appeared back on the bench.
• Ricky Bobby and Jared Boll locked horns, in retaliation to a Boll hit on Bruno, in which Ricky Bobby took a beating to the tune of 19 minutes in penalties. Of course he got nailed for the instigator call, but we've watched teams pull that bullshit for 3 weeks and not get a call. I'm calling shenanigans. Complete and utter poppycock. To make the call an even bigger load of dung, he got an automatic extra 2 minutes for instigating a fight with a visor. Ain't that bout a bitch?
• Boll got in his second scuffle of the night, after he hit Hammer high in the Hawks corner. MegaMayer took exception and ended up with an instigator of his very own. They don't call it all season FOR the Hawks, and they call it twice in two periods against. I don't often bitch about the officiating, but THIS was a truck load of bullshit.
• Thanks to Quenneville's stupid fetish with forwards at the point on the powerplay, Bolland turned it over and then got beat shorthanded. After getting away with a pretty blatant trip, the Jackets couldn't finish, but they had the Hawks by the balls.
• Whatever yips Kaner has, need to vacate the premises stat. He looks like he's actually afraid to shoot, and needs to shake this shit off.
• It's official, Bryan Bickell no longer has a spot on this team. Hayes is bigger, and more useful. Shaw hits more people and is more versatile. Now, Bick has this 4 day long drag move he's trying to use, because apparently the 3 day wrist shot wasn't enough in his tiny tool bag. We've beaten this horse as long as we can, time to go.

The Ugly

• The powerplay is worse than clown college, it's fucking clown preschool. For such world class players, they can't seem to make it compute. I've seen mens league team run much more efficient power plays. Just shoot the puck. Do they realize that a powerplay means they outnumber the opposing players? FOR FUCKS SAKES, BOYS!

Here are your video highlights:

The Hits Just Keep Coming

While the Blackhawks aren't having Pittsburgh Penguins luck, they ARE having bad luck of their own. The rumors hit late Sunday night that the time Patrick Sharp missed in the Wings game was due to a fractured wrist. More reports came out Monday to, at least, confirm that the wrist is covered under "upper body" injury classification, and that it was indeed a wrist issue. As we wait for details of the injury, we have this clear cool January morning to ask just what this means for the Hawks. These last few games have pointed out the glaring holes in the Hawks lineup, and with an important top 6 winger out for 3-4 weeks, the holes have only gotten bigger and deeper. I think we can all agree that the current holes are at the #5 Defenseman spot, and #2 or #3 Center. Let's debate a few scenarios:

-Now the #5 defenseman spot would be the easiest to fill. While we would all like to give that moniker to Montador, he just hasn't been "that guy". He's been a #6 defenseman. So who is out on the market for defender? Names that will be UFA's after this year are Matt Hunwick from Colorado, Jason Garrison from Uncle Dale's Panthers, Milan Jurcina from the Isles, Kurtis Foster from the Devils, Tim Gleason from the Canes, or someone really low risk like Sheldon Brookbank from Anaheim. There are older big men like Hal Gill from Montreal, or Mark Eaton from the Isles that could provide veteran leadership, as well. There are a few names in the Hawks division, but I just can't see any team in their division being stupid enough to offer them ammo. The name Josh Gorges of Montreal has been floated, but I can't see him coming easy or cheap, and with the more pressing needs, they need to use the cap space they have wisely. Gorges makes more than Hjalmarsson, puts up the same numbers, and is signed though 2017-18. Do the Hawks want to eat up more than half their cap room with a guy that's more overpriced than Hammer and 3 years older?

-The Blackhawks center controversy has been well documented and widely lamented. If Invisibolly would finally grow a pair of balls and use some of his talent, he could be the #2 center of this team. This would solve a lot of problems, because sliding someone like Kruger or even Mayers up into the #3 spot would be much easier and realistic. If Quenneville has the balls to play Dan Carcillo in his top 6, Jamal Mayers can play on the third line, because he is more responsible, and less of a liability than Carcillo, period. Andrew Shaw or Kruger shouldn't have an issue playing checking line center, and how much do you see of a checking line in the playoffs anyway? It's common sense that a #3 guy is much easier to find than a #2 guy, though. Alas, Bolland seems to be content on wasting away with the third line, to leave the Hawks with a glaring black hole at #2. So, just who is on the lame duck list as far as centers? Not much. Paul Gaustad from Buffalo, and Brendan Morrison of Calgary. There is always vomit inducing thoughts of Samuel Pahlsson, Colin Fraser, and Jake Dowell. Maybe Stan has some inside information, but this is going to be a tough one to solve.

-Top 6 Winger is going to be interesting. You have Kane, Toews, and Hossa as locks, which leaves 3 pretty big question marks. Even of Kruger is back soon, he's not the short term answer. I like the kid but he would take an absolute BEATING in the playoffs against teams like Nashville, Detroit and Vancouver, and with his bleary melon, I'm not investing too much in the contributions of young Dream Warrior. I've given up all hope on Frolik and Bickell providing anything valuable to this team, this year, if ever. Hayes has looked REALLY impressive in his first 5 games, but I'm not so sure he's ready for NHL top 6 minutes (baby steps, folks). Brunette is slow as the day is long, but he can fill in on the top six. With Ben Smith recalled, they have few choices left in Rockford with Brandon Pirri, and Jeremy Morin but neither are "the answer". That still leaves some pretty big holes, if Brunette can just be serviceable (see above).

Blackhawks vs. Red Wings - Loss Recap

"Legends of the Fall"

"Pogo, Pogo, Pogo, Pogo, Pogo, Pogo, Jump!"

Out of the flame and right back into the fire. After getting shut out the other night, the Hawks were back at the UC to face the Redwings of GhettoTown, USA. If the Hawks couldn't muster up some effort for this game, there is good reason to start worrying. If the Hawks can't win these early January home games, then what are we to expect when they hit the road for 3 weeks in February. I guess we're going to have to find out the hard way.

The first period on Sunday's game started out heavily in the Hawks favored with two goals in 44 seconds, to go up 2-0, but the Wings fought back to score one of their own. With the shots tied 9-9 you can get a good idea of how the period went. The second period is more of what you'd expect for a Hawks/Wings game. It was more physical, with chances both ways, and no scoring. The Hawks also out shot the Wings 11-6 in this middle frame. The third period ended up being a huge let down for the Hawks, as they gave up the game tying goal with 5 minutes to go in the game. This one was going to be decided in extra time, and the Wings were the big winners. The slide continues.

The Good

• Believe it or not the Hawks scored a powerplay goal and it was by, of all people, Invisibolly. The original shot from the point by Hossa was blocked and ended up on the stick of Bolland who fought to throw it towards the cage. It was deflected off the skate of a Wings defender, and creeped into the net ever so slowly.
• Shooter followed up the Bolland PP goal and made it 2-0 just 44 seconds later. He took a Wings turnover in the slot and slid over into the middle of the zone, beating Conklin on a backside slapshot to the stick side. That's the last we saw of young Sharpie.
• The fourth line was very good all night and ended up getting a penalty shot out of their hard work. Even though he was stopped on the penalty shot, don't discount Jimmy Hayes work with MegaMayers and Bruno.
• Watching Toews on faceoffs, is like watching an instructional video on how to take them. He's like Mr. Automatic. He was 16-20 on the night.
• Andrew Shaw has a motor that just doesn't quit, but the way he throws his body around, his career isn't going to be long. I'll enjoy him while he's around, though.

The Bad

• Valtteri Filppula put the Wings on the board with a 5-on-3 powerplay goal after Seabrook almost ate a puck in the mouth courtesy of a trip by the big dumb piece of shit formerly known as Tomas Holmstrom. Seabrook moved over to take on a Lidstrom shot, and Holmstrom tripped him in a manner than made him fall face first into the shot. Of course the refs only saw the two handed revenge whack Seabrook gave Holmstrom. I was hoping Seabrook would have broken his ankle. Douche bag!
• The Wings tied up the game with about 5 minutes to go when a rebound of a Zetterberg shot that Cleary tipped snuck through Crawford and trickled through the crease. As Leddy tried to stop the puck he was cross checked in the back by Filppula and the puck dribbled in the net. Goals like that are just painful at that point in the game, but Filppula should have been called.
• In another shit show of a goal, Pavel Datsyuk picked up a loose puck at the goal line while Crawford was down on the ice, and banked it off Nick Leddy into the net to win the game. There has been debate that Leddy was out of position, but from what I saw, there was too much chaos in the crease for Leddy to cut off the angle without walking on Crawford's back.
• The biggest worry is that Shooter missed 2/3rds of the game with the obligatory upper body injury. Doctor Lineblender was fairly cryptic about having to do more tests on Sharpie. Word on the street is that he has a fractured wrist. This could be a huge issue with gaping holes in the Center spot and on Defense already.
• Lets hope this fucking Frolik at center experiment is over. I like the guy, but he's having an awful year. Two of his 5 goals are empty netters, and he only has 11 points. He had an assist on the Sharp goal, but he was only 1-4 at the dot. Not the answer.

The Ugly

• The powerplay is still Clown College. Bolly's goal was pure luck. With one less powerplay guy out there, they are going to need help. I hope Stan Bowman fired up his iPhone bright and early this morning.
• It wouldn't be a Blackhawks game without a shorthanded chance against. This time it was Darren Helm outracing the Hawks defense. Luckily it was blocked.
• Minus 2 for Kaner, and nothing on 5 shots. The yips have hit him, and with Shooter out, they are going to need him in a BAD way.

Here are your video highlights:

Blackhawks vs. Avalanche - Loss Recap

"WHITEWASH"



Fresh off a highly disappointing loss in Philly Thursday night, the Blackhawks were back home to face the red hot Colorado Avalanche. The Avs were 4-1 in their last 5 games, 8-2 in their last 10, and won 3 previous games on the road which could spell trouble for the Hawks. The hot baby Blackhawks got another chance to show their skills, and Crawford was back in net for the Hawks. The Hawks faces this summers Avalanche free agent signing Semyon Varlamov.

Both the Hawks and Avs had chances in the first period, but the Hawks couldn't solve the Avs netminder. The Avs gave themselves a lead on a redirected goal, and also lead in shots 8-5 at the first intermission. The second period became a nightmare for the Hawks. Even though they outshot the Avs 12-8, they were outscored 2-0. The Avs seemed to capitalize on every single Hawks mistake. Unfortunately, the third period was just more of the same with the Avs putting the Hawks away, scoring the forth goal of the game on just half a dozen shots. The Hawks were victims of a team that just continued to be hot and capitalize on every good chance.

The Good

• I'm not anointing the kid a savior at all, but when Doctor Lineblender put Shaw out there at center with Bickell and Stalberg you could clearly see him deliberately jumping back as one of the first defenders in the Hawks zone. The kid is smart, and annoying. The comparison to Steve Ott was a good one. Anyhow, After just watching three veterans half ass it, he jumped out on the ice and showed that he's paying attention and willing to do the dirty work.
• You can't pin this loss completely on the Hawks, because they DID get some even strength chances, but Semyon Varlamov was just super man all night. The Avs were outshot 22-14 in the final two periods and didn't give up any goals.
• I'm not going all Ben Smith on these guys, but the baby Blackhawks earned extra time in important situations. Olsen was seen playing with the other top 4 guys, even though that was because Q had the brilliant idea to dress Big Slow for THREE FUCKING MINUTES of ice time. Olsen led the Hawks with 5 hits, and seemed to have a jump in his step. Hayes was pretty noticeable all night around the net, moving up to get some time with the top 6 guys, and getting almost 15 minutes of ice time. Shaw was a minus 1, but he centered the shutdown line for most of the second half of the game. His minus 1 was a casualty of the third Avs goal where 3 Hawks players let Landeskog put on a show.
• Hey, they didn't give up a powerplay goal, right?
• Pick-to-Click Vik was sent in on a break-away in the third period and beat Varlamov...but hit the post. Isn't that just what you would expect? Shooter had a similar chance a few minutes later, but Varlamov was better.
• Crawford didn't have a great night, but three of the 4 goals were tip-ins or back door goals. Only one of them could really be hung on Crawford's hook, but that one goal was an ugly one.

The Bad

• David Jones put the first goal of the game in on Crawford thirteen minutes in. He redirected an Erik Johnson shot into the upper corner while Leddy and Hammer allowed Jones set up camp in front of the net, like it was his job. Any time you two would love to defend your own zone is fine with us.
• The Avs went up 2-0 early in the second period when Kaner, Invisibolly, and Sharpie (All of whom have played center) coasted back on defense, and let the Avs TJ Galiardi freely sneak in on the back door. He took a slick little pass from Paul Stastny, and had a wide open net to shoot at. Fucking SLOP, I tell you!
• After being 1 out of their last 22 powerplays, they failed on their only one last night. Just to REALLY piss in everyone's fucking Wheaties, they followed up the Clown College powerplay with an awful goal against. Leddy half assed a pass to Keith behind the net that Landeskog got a piece of, a la Tazer's steal against the Flyers. Landeskog somehow dragged the puck in front with Leddy, Deuce and Stalberg all within 2 feet of him. It squirted off his stick and right to David Van Der Gulik, who was streaking to the net. Crawford went down on the initial Landeskog attempt and never recovered, leaving the corners open.
• The Avs Chuck Kobasew Put the cherry on top of the sundae with just 2 minutes to go in the game, sending the Hawks away with their tails between their legs. Whatever, thanks for the effort.
• It has to be pointed out, but all night you see the Avs tipping shots on Crawford, but how many shots did you see tipped on Varlamov? Very few if any. WHY?

The Ugly

• I mentioned this briefly but seriously, WHAT THE FUCK, Q? You have a rookie in his second NHL game and you pair him up with JOHN SCOTT who isn't worthy of more than 3:25? Sami Lepisto isn't worth more than that? REALLY? He didn't see the ice after the first 5 minutes of the second period. FOUR TOTAL SHIFTS!
• Is Nick Leddy finally starting to crack under the pressure? He was absolutely brutal all night. His minus 4, with multiple turnovers were evidence of that. Hammer wasn't much better, tossing HIS minus 3 into the mix. Good thing the Hawks have a solid 3rd pair to pick up the slack...oh wait.
• Once again, the joke that is the NHL instigation penalty was mocked. TJ Galiardi chased down Invisibolly after he got a piece of Paul Stastny and jumped him. That's only an instigator when you're Big Slow. Fucking JOKE!

Here are your video highlights:

Blackhawks at Philadelphia - Loss Recap

"Philly Cheesedicks"



The Hawks were in Philly Thursday night to face the Flyers, fresh off their Winter Classic loss to the Rangers. The Flyers had an almost identical record to the Hawks, and are a very similar hard nosed team. With two of their top players (Pronger, Jagr) not playing, they are still obviously a very dangerous team. Based on the many recent news reports, they are apparently still salty about the Hawks skating the Stanley Cup around their ice two seasons ago. Cry me a river.

The first period of last night's game was like the wild fucking west. There were excellent chances both ways, fights, gun slinging, and end to end rushes. Both teams scored but the Flyers out shot the Hawks 13-7. The Flyers opened up the game in the second period scoring three goals to the Hawks single goal, which left the Hawks scratching their heads. Philly had 21 shots and the Hawks mustered up 15 shots, themselves. That's just ridiculous shot totals for one period, for both sides. The Hawks mounted a furious comeback in the third period, but napped during the last 45 seconds of the game, which cost them a point, at least. Philly was able to celebrate a dramatic 5-4 win, in a middle of the season random game. Congrats, Guys.

The Good

• Hazer scored his second goal in 2 games on a nice feed from MegaMayers just 3 minutes into the first period. The play started with Hazer forechecking hard enough to make the Philly defender throw the puck away like a rotten egg, and MegaMayers followed up by just keeping the puck in the Philly zone. He settled the puck, and saucered a pass to Hazer who redirected it past Bryzgalov. Hayes was near the puck or net all night long and played VERY strong on the puck. A few Philly defenders tried to muscle him, and failed. Take note, Bick, if Paul Bunyan can keep up this pace, your days are numbered and it won't take much to fill your spot, son. Four good shots and a goal in only 8:33 of ice time for Hazer. You can't really ask for any more than that.
• Shaw scored HIS first NHL goal smack dab in the middle of the second period. He deked and froze three Flyers players, and surprised Bryzgalov with a nifty little shot. Way to follow up that bloodbath you were the victim of, earlier. I thought Carcillo was an annoying pain n the ass, but Shaw seemed to make every Flyers player want to wring his neck by the end of the first period. If HE keeps this up, Car Bomb's days are DEFINITELY numbered, but this is game #1. Lets see what happens when players know what to expect from him.
• Quenneville played Doctor Lineblender AGAIN to open the third period, moving Stalberg up with Toews and Sharp, and then moving Shaw down with Hoss and Kaner.
• Seabrook took advantage of a Philly powerplay shot that rang hard off the post, and pulled the Hawks within one goal, shorthanded from the dreaded questionable double minor, no less. Bolly and Seabs saw a window of opportunity and jumped into the play taking full advantage. Definitely a goal Bryzgalov would like back.
• 25 seconds after the Seabs goal, Party Boy, El Capitan and Shooter combined for a dramatic game tying goal. Toews caused a turnover low in the Philly zone and the puck ended up on the stick of Shooter who must have wet himself because, for some unforeseen reason, the entire Philly team left Party Boy sitting in the slot all by himself. An easy pass from Shooter put the Hawks back in the game, for now.
• I guess no gnews is good gnews, with Gary Gnu. As far as Dylan Olsen's NHL debut, that is. Three shots on net, and no noticeable gaffes playing with the wilderness adventure that is Lurch.

The Bad

• While I like his spirit, Shaw took a bit of an ass beating in his second shift of his NHL career, immediately following the Hayes goal. He was bloodied pretty good from a couple of Rinaldo straight rights, but later returned.
• The Hawks missed a glorious chance half way through the first, with Shooter and El Capitan going in on a 2-on-1, from their own blue line, following what looked like a save off Razor's mask. Tazer held it long enough to clear the defender and dished to Shooter, who couldn't get the puck over Bryzgalov's pad. Not to be outdone, the same combination missed another 2-on-1 in the third period, that would have put the Hawks up 5-4.
• Nick Leddy can hang the first Flyers goal on his hook. He had a chance to get the puck out of the zone and dicked around with it long enough to turn it over to Voracek. Of course, the puck worked around, all the way back around to Voracek who hit a wide open cage. Razor had over pursued the play on the initial shot and wasn't able to get back in the net in time.
• Seventeen seconds after the Shaw goal, Scotty Carrot Top re-tied the game, smacking a puck out of the air, and past Razor. I'll give credit where it's due because it was a very nice play. He must jerk off to pictures of Claude Giroux every night, because "G" is helping him have a career year.
• Philly took the lead on a goal by some asshole named Harry ZolnierFuck, when Razor kicked a rebound right out to him. Hossa broke down on the play and took a nap on D, letting ZolnierFuck head to the net unabated to pick up the fat rebound.
• Twenty three seconds after the ZolnierFuck goal, Leddy and Hammer got worked over and Stalberg made a soft play completely bailing on taking the body. JVR picked up a second rebound, after Razor made a tremendous save on Wayne Simmonds, and pitched it in the net. Total fucking slop by the Hawks D. Not a stellar night for the the dynamic duo of Leddy and Hammer.
• JVR sent the Hawks home losers scoring a powerplay goal with just 33 seconds left in regulation. Gotta love those trivial high sticking penalties at the end of a 4-4 game. Just fucking spiffy. Kaner givith, Kaner taketh away. The play should have been snuffed out anyway, but the Hawks allowed Giroux enough time to wait for the change send the puck to a streaking Carrot Top. It began as a 2-on-4 play, so ONE of the Hawks defenders, namely MegaMayers, should have been able to pressure Giroux, who was standing still, just over the Hawks blue line.

The Ugly

• I don't know what the fuck is going on in his head, but Bryzgalov looked lethargic all night long. He's clearly not comfortable. He made a nice save on the Toews/Sharp 2-on-1, but the rest of the game he was fighting the puck badly.
• For the second game in a row, someone bailed out on making contact with One-Trick-Bick. This time it was waterbug Danny Briere. He CLEARLY didn't realize who's big shadow was bearing down on him, because Bickell is the last guy that's going to hit him.
• 46 shots against. That's really all one has to say. Deplorable!
• Invisibolly and Kaner were a combined 5-21 at the dot. I hope their bungholes are sore this morning, because they got gang raped. Your #2 and #3 centers right there, folks.

Here are your video highlights:

New Year Gripes and Grudges

Here we are, barely 4 days into the new year, and the juicy controversies are flaring up like a fresh case of New Years Hemorrhoids, or that case of Herpes you contracted kissing random hookers in the bar at midnight. Anyhow, New Years is a good point to start the rumors and drama, as it's almost exactly the halfway point of the season, and this is where the nitty gritty begins. We find out which players and teams have the staying power, and which were just a fluke. There is no more fucking off allowed, because there is another tight stretch run upon us, and any team can turn a hot streak into a playoff ruining run for the others. So what's new, you ask?

Dan "Car Bomb" Carcillo

I'm going to refrain from using his nickname because, like I said in the recap the other day, I'm thoroughly convinced that Carcillo is Italian for "Douchebag Circus". The day they signed him, we all shook our collective heads. That is, aside from the puck bunnies who find his toothless hillbilly mug cute, but then again fame and money make even some of the most vile cretins enticing. But I digress, He's been nothing but a pain in the ass his entire career, so why would we expect any less? Anyone with actual hockey knowledge beyond "he's cute", knows this. Here we are 39 games into the season, he's been suspended twice, and is about to incur the Shanaban for a third time because of his utterly stupid play Monday night. All too often fans confuse "edge", "grit", or whatever recent buzz word the people on the Intarwebs are feeding you, with complete stupidity. This is no different. Fighting for position does NOT entail completely ignoring the puck and dangerously throwing a guy into the boards. I'll repeat that for those that have to use their fingers to read along; completely ignoring the puck. At the VERY least, that play is interference, people. Argue all you'd like, and I'd love to be able to argue FOR a Blackhawks player, but you're just going to look like a naive homer. This is not 1970, or even 2007, for that matter. It's a different league. We might as well call it NHL for No Hit League. He could have done any one of a hundred other things, and he picked the one choice he always does, the most stupid one. I said it two days before the incident, and I'm going to repeat it; We have one person to blame for this calamity, STAN BOWMAN. He ran out and signed Carcillo, which means that Quenneville had to find a way to work him in, and we have to endure the ensuing shit show. I gave young Daniel the benefit of the doubt and even bought a Carcillo t-shirt to show my support. He just did what he has always done with his limited mental capacity and hillbilly grin, and shot himself in the foot, or the left leg if you want to get technical. I'm not going to argue in favor of a moronic play just purely because he's a Blackhawks player, and because I bought a t-shirt with his name and number on it. That's the definition of partial and truly stupid.

With pending news of Carcillo's injury, which looked about as bad as it can get, we might have very well seen the last of #13 in a Blackhawks sweater, because contrary to whatever delusional fairy tale you might be subscribing to, Bowman would be a complete and utter moron to sign this trainwreck to another deal. Taking a minor risk on a one year deal is one thing, but subscribing to the asshattery and re-signing him is a completely different situation. This is not Philly, where they gave him 2 and a half seasons to become a completely irrelevant sideshow. Bowman signed him to a 1 year deal for a specific reason, to dump his ass if he remained a goomba douchebag idiot, and what do you know? The spade is still a spade. Dan Carcillo is the ACE of Spades, folks.

Marcus "Dream Warrior" Kruger

Ohhhhhh, did we fuck this one up, Fellas! After practice yesterday, Quenneville stated that Kruger had a step backward in his recovery from what looks like a second concussion, or one great big long concussion. Mind you, if they had handled the first concussion right, the 21 year old's brain might not be the equivalent of pureed bananas at this point in his young career. It's pretty clear that they rushed him back, or that he flat out lied to the bus load of physicians that hover around the Hawks camp. Honestly, I can't believe for one foggy second that he was able to fool the entire training staff, yet he was allowed to play a mere 6 days after the initial incident. First game back, and he has his head rattled, not once, not twice, but three times a lady. Now we're told he is out indefinitely and probably locked in a dark room somewhere being handfed pudding, and wearing an adult diaper. Now before I go off on some jaunt about this ordeal, I'm going to save my time and point you in the direction of someone that's a little more eloquent a writer than I; John over at The Fifth Feather. Click here to read his most recent article "Headshots and Us", regarding this situation, that was posted in Friday's Committed Indian. Food for thought.

Blackhawks vs. Oilers - Loss Recap

"The Strange Case of Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde"


Welcome to 2012! The Hawks were back at the United Center to host the Edmonton Oilers, Monday evening. Yes, I'm speaking of the same Oilers that whipped the Hawks asses 9-2 about a month go. This was a very good chance for the Hawks to get a little revenge, but it was not going to be an easy task. This Oilers team is fast, and can obviously score at will. They are one of those teams that you can't hate, if only to admire their youth and skill. Even though he wasn't playing, the Oilers have one of my favorite ex-Hawks Nik Khabibulin. He was the Bryzgalov before Ilya was. I still hold spot in my goalie handbook for him. On to the festivities:

The first period was MUCH better than the last game in Edmonton, as both teams managed 10 shots, and the Hawks jumping on an Oilers turnover to lead 1-0 after 20 minutes, but it wasn't to last. Thanks to a bad Hawks major penalty the Oilers jumped into the game, scoring 2 powerplay goals on the ensuing powerplay, and another even strength goal. The Hawks were able to score one of their own, but still went into the locker room down 3-2. In the third period, the Hawks failure on the powerplay is what cost them a win, even though each team had a goal. They have no one to blame but themselves.

The Good

• El Capitan was the beneficiary of some LEGAL hard work by Car Bomb, and was able to take the Car Bomb pass and get a fairly weak goal on Dubnyk to put the Hawks up 1-0.
• Bruno tied the game back up for the Hawks just after the Carcillo major ended, when he tipped a Hammer shot past Dubnyk. With momentum in the Oilers favor at that point, this was a huge play by a veteran leader.
• Jimmy Hayes scored his first NHL goal with just under 4 minutes to go in the game, after the Hawks blew a 4 minute powerplay. Nice to see the kid step up and make something happen, just too bad it wasn't enough.
• Crawdaddy had a beautiful breakaway save late in the first to keep the Hawks up 1-0, but a couple of the goals he gave up were a little on the soft side.
• The Hawks out shot the Oilers 42-30 which is right where you would like to see the Hawks be.

The Bad

• Of course 16 seconds into the 5 minute powerplay on Car Bomb, the Oilers pick up a rebound in the crease, and stuff it home. That's Karma, right there.
• The circus continued with a minute and a half left in the Carcillo major. Hammer took a stick to the face, which wasn't called. He then laid on the ice, but not long enough to draw a whistle. He then decided to toss his stick around the zone like like a puppy kicking a tennis ball around, instead of just getting into the play and tying a player up. Once he finally picked his stick up, he spun around like an idiot with his back to the player he should have covered, Taylor Hall, who put the puck past Crawford on a fairly weak shot at a weak angle. It was a play straight out of a Three Stooges flick.
• Andy Sutton put the Oilers back up 3-2 when Stalberg, Sharpie, and Pistol all let him skate right up the middle of the ice and receive a pass. Not a good combination when you have a guy that can't move and a rusty guy that hasn't moved in 4 fucking weeks out there together. Maybe you should have played Pistol more than once a fucking month JOEL.
• Former Hawk Ben Eager scored a bad goal, on a backhander, about halfway through the third period to ice the game. In what should have been an easy stop, Crawford didn't pick up the backhander and it beat him to the stick side. That makes for two bad ones out of four goals.
• I'd never wish injury on a Hawks player, but maybe this Carcillo injury will open the door for a player with some talent other than serving Shanaban suspensions.
• Pistol and Big Slow both played under 7 minutes each. Great job running your horses into the ground, Q. This will prove to be a very wise choice in April, I'm certain.
• Everyone but El Capitan (64%) got their dicks whipped at the dot. Belanger and Gagner laid the smacketh down, to the tune of 14-20 (70%).

The Ugly

• Apparently, Sam Gagner hasn't read his scouting reports, and doesn't know that Bryan Bickell is afraid of contact. Gagner was clearly terrified of Bick, almost running from a possible physical confrontation in the Oilers defensive zone.
• I'm convinced that Carcillo is Italian for "Circus". Car Bomb continued to be controversial in the second period, Monday. He dumped the puck into the Oilers zone so the Hawks could change, and tried to make an impact in the worst way; illegally. He put a big hit on Gilbert, throwing him into the boards awkwardly. Pick any assortment of calls on the play, but the Hawks were down for 5 minutes and Carcillo has a dinner date with Brendan Shanaban. To top it all off, Gilbert fell on Carcillo's leg and injured him.
• The bottom line on this one is that the Oilers scored 2 goals on their extended powerplay and the Hawks didn't score any on theirs. It is really as simple as that.

Here are your video highlights: